Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
Randomize
