I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
