i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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