i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
