Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
