wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
