After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
