That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize
