i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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