Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I'm sobbing to NWA
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
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