Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Banned from zoo.
Again?
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Randomize