how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize