I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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