According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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