I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
