I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
