One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Drunk walkin through police station. America
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
