i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Randomize
