A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
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so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
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He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background