He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
I have to watch that.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.