I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
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