Texts From Last Night

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  (213): View more from California

  those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later

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  (213): those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later http://tfl.nu/envj
  Replies (9) Good night (6306) Bad night (707)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.

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  (507): We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night. http://tfl.nu/sjq5
  Replies (5) Good night (4691) Bad night (798)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now

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  (303): She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now http://tfl.nu/p6no
  Replies (26) Good night (1376) Bad night (4430)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.

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  (602): Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter. http://tfl.nu/60s7
  Replies (17) Good night (1255) Bad night (4875)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.

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  (913): I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America. http://tfl.nu/aex4
  Replies (15) Good night (7651) Bad night (824)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone

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  (203): She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone http://tfl.nu/bzdp
  Replies (25) Good night (6507) Bad night (1229)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.

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  (573): My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly. http://tfl.nu/go2x
  Replies (7) Good night (7202) Bad night (1070)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..

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  (803): No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick.. http://tfl.nu/tonx
  Replies (23) Good night (6533) Bad night (1269)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.

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  (978): he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend. http://tfl.nu/v7b4
  Replies (16) Good night (1633) Bad night (7531)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.

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  (617): Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here. http://tfl.nu/6cd7
  Replies (4) Good night (3026) Bad night (984)
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  (863): View more from Florida

  my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.

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  (863): my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car. http://tfl.nu/8sk6
  Replies (10) Good night (1722) Bad night (821)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume

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  (248): I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume http://tfl.nu/d1bc
  Replies (4) Good night (948) Bad night (1058)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.

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  (484): dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow. http://tfl.nu/dkso
  Replies (7) Good night (1432) Bad night (555)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick

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  (201): thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick http://tfl.nu/xnq8
  Replies (9) Good night (1256) Bad night (514)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk

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  (608): Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk http://tfl.nu/yyy6
  Replies (3) Good night (658) Bad night (462)

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