Texts From Last Night

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  (519): View more from Ontario

  It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.

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  (519): It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night. http://tfl.nu/y7pe
  Replies (2) Good night (583) Bad night (1150)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol

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  (309): nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol http://tfl.nu/jhs1
  Replies (54) Good night (1655) Bad night (3345)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Fuck appropriateness.

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  (301): Fuck appropriateness. http://tfl.nu/83xq
  Replies (17) Good night (5998) Bad night (675)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.

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  (850): The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad. http://tfl.nu/dk8u
  Replies (27) Good night (607) Bad night (5225)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun

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  (630): life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun http://tfl.nu/2zbz
  Replies (29) Good night (1127) Bad night (2978)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop

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  (412): dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop http://tfl.nu/q8xc
  Replies (18) Good night (6657) Bad night (645)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it

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  (360): my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it http://tfl.nu/8lil
  Replies (12) Good night (4742) Bad night (901)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her

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  (678): SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her http://tfl.nu/v70p
  Replies (20) Good night (2901) Bad night (4242)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011

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  (816): why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011 http://tfl.nu/szze
  Replies (9) Good night (2329) Bad night (917)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.

  (1-978): View more from Massachusetts

  Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.

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  (978): This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke. (1-978): Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting. http://tfl.nu/cqts
  Replies (11) Good night (3539) Bad night (692)
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  (310): View more from California

  My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."

  (323): View more from California

  If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.

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  (310): My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity." (323): If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing. http://tfl.nu/54s4
  Replies (8) Good night (2851) Bad night (709)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.

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  (802): I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel. http://tfl.nu/xk67
  Replies (11) Good night (1952) Bad night (560)
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  (315): View more from New York

  I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.

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  (315): I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady. http://tfl.nu/u0md
  Replies (19) Good night (2161) Bad night (634)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.

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  (413): Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like. http://tfl.nu/c9vg
  Replies (8) Good night (370) Bad night (1501)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?

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  (780): Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office? http://tfl.nu/0lyw
  Replies (6) Good night (306) Bad night (582)

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