My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Randomize