Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
