Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
