When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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