doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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