if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I feel like a drive thru vagina
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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