love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
