Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Randomize