do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
