forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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