What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
