He is such a slut. More and more my type.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
