Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
