I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize