Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
