Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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