I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
We have started to decorate penises.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
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