What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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