He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
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