Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
