Where is the hickey?
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Randomize
