i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
