If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NoShamevember. You game?
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize