In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize