doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
