i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
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