why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
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