Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Randomize
