I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
look no pants
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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