Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
you would pick up someone in the library
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize